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Critters

January 3rd, 2008 by unkle lancifer · 2 Comments


Two bounty hunters from outer space who can absorb the identity of anyone around them are hired to hunt down a group of escapees from a prison asteroid. These on-the-run aliens are really on-the-roll as they’re in the form of fuzzy bowling bowls with countless teeth and shootable poisonous quills. Like most new arrivals to Earth their first stop is DEE WALLACE STONE’s house. Here Dee is a Midwestern farmer’s wife with two kids, a precocious ginger boy (SCOTT GRIMES) and a daughter preoccupied with locking lips with a young BILLY ZANE. One of the bounty hunters quickly assumes the form of an ‘80s era rock star while the more fickle one assumes the identities of various townsfolk. Equipped with futuristic weapons, they aid the family in clearing the town of the terrorizing GREMLINS inspired mutant tumbleweeds. There’s no real scares or gore here and the focus is more on quipy humor sometimes delivered in the hairy hooligans own tongue and subtitled for maximum comedic effect. By films end, the stakes are raised when a giant sized critter joins the fray but all ends well with the miraculous reverse collapse of the family home complete with reconstructed mailbox with beloved family feline CHEWY residing within safe from harm and flying quills.

INDELIBLE SCENE(S)

  • Horribly accurate mid-eighties music video
  • Critter language has a facsimile for the F word
  • Critter rips E.T. doll to shreds
  • Village idiot turns out to be virtuoso at baseball and Molotov cocktail throwing
  • One well-placed firecracker destroys critter spacecraft
  • Dad’s GHOSTBUSTERS-esque bowling shirt

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Tags: Tykes in Trouble




2 responses so far ↓

  • 1 mdanyellee82No Gravatar // Mar 4, 2010 at 5:14 pm

    i remember this flick too well…for years, i would wake up in the middle of the night and be petrified that they were under my bed and would attack me the second i tried to get up.  ah, childhood memories…

  • 2 Drew BluddNo Gravatar // Jan 2, 2014 at 1:16 pm

    I bowl in leagues a couple of nights a week and ‘Pinbusters’ is a common team name. Is this movie the cause of it?

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