Category: Traumafessions

Hi, I really enjoy your site, so I figured I should contribute…

One of many things that scared me as a kid was one of the early covers for THE EXORCIST novel by WILLIAM PETER BLATTY.

I was a friend's house and spotted it on a shelf and found the image of the girl so scary it gave me nightmares for days. Yet every time I would go to his place I would find some excuse to have a peek, compelled to face my fear.

Compelled or not, I did not want to be left alone in that room with the book, no matter how many lights were on.

Even now, I find that image more frightening than LINDA BLAIR in the DICK SMITH makeup (with no disrespect intended).

Best,

DK

P.S.: I have another story to tell about a show that scared me as a kid, but I'll save that story for next time.

UNK SEZ:: Thanks DK, I've always been fascinated by that book cover too. Have you ever heard THIS HERE tidbit before?

Hey guys,

I recently discovered your site a few days ago and have been scrolling through it ever since. I think I'm going to have to watch some of your favourite movies, as my enjoyment of horror films (even the so-bad-they're-good ones) is slowly being reawakened.

After doing a quick search, it seems one of my many childhood traumas has not been posted yet, so here goes. It involves that ‘80s T.V. series THE INCREDIBLE HULK.

Now, I was never terrified by the Hulk. Even though I was only 5 or 6 when it was on, and even though he was big and green and monstrous, I knew he was the good guy, and never meant anyone any real harm. And I adored him. No, it wasn't him that traumatized me.

It was that other guy, the Evil Hulk.

He was much scrawnier in comparison, but those dilated white eyes, those bushy black eyebrows, that snarl, the hair that looked like he just licked his finger and stuck it into an electrical socket. He was a horrific version of the hero I knew and loved.

I never wanted to have to watch the two-part episode that the Evil Hulk was featured in, any time it came on. But I knew I had to, because I hated him so much, and I knew that I had to endure the terror if I was to ever see the Good Hulk kick that evil mofo's ass. So imagine my disappointment after finding a clip of the final scene, and watching it for the first time in about thirty years after forgetting how it ended. I won't spoil it, but let's just say the Hulk's "victory" is rather, well, anticlimactic:

Regards,

Steve

There were a lot of horror films that deeply affected me as a child. One of my earliest film-going remembrances was the time my father took me to see the original PLANET OF THE APES (1968) on its first theatrical release. The problem was is that we arrived a bit too early, and we caught the film's big shock ending … CHARLTON HESTON rides up on the beach with his cave woman girlfriend to see the remnants of the Statue of Liberty and we learn that this so-called "alien planet" is in fact the planet Earth after some unspecified holocaust. As a child of eight, I was only vaguely aware of the nuclear threat at this time, and I was suitably unnerved by this final image. CHUCK HESTON's histrionics notwithstanding ("He's screaming and wailing – just like your mother!" my dad pointed out, laughing), I begged out of watching PLANET and we departed after seeing the considerably milder second feature, THE WATERMELON MAN.

The fact that the world could go up in particulate matter with the press of a button would be explored further in the PLANET OF THE APES sequel, BENEATH THE PLANET OF THE APES (1969), educating countless school kids about the insecure status of humanity in the postwar world in a succession of G-rated installments.

One other film that clued me in to the haunting finality of death, nuclear or otherwise, was the first adaptation of RICHARD MATHESON's "I Am Legend," THE LAST MAN ON EARTH (1964). VINCENT PRICE is seemingly the only human being left on the planet after a mysterious plague sweeps the world, transforming other survivors into vampires. PRICE barricades himself in his suburban home (supposed to be in Los Angeles, but shot in Rome – giving the film an even more off-kilter flavor), while at night the undead hordes call out to him to join them – stark shots of black-and-white terror that could be dropped wholesale into GEORGE A. ROMERO's NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (1968) without the slightest trace of continuity error.

Two scenes in LAST MAN chilled me to the bone, and continue to do so – those who denigrated this film, which included VINCENT PRICE and RICHARD MATHESON, fail to grasp the power this strange film still wields. PRICE loses his young daughter to the plague, and bodies are tossed into a giant fiery pit at the edge of town in an effort to control the pestilence. PRICE tries to spare his daughter an anonymous burial (remember, the Holocaust was still very recent when this was filmed, and filmed in Europe), he is pushed aside by an impatient government worker who says, "There are a lot of daughters down there – including mine!" Never had the Apocalypse been rendered with such blunt, unsympathetic words to my then-tender ears.

The second scene has VINCENT PRICE discovering a bedraggled poodle and he is momentarily cheered with the prospect of a companion to ride out his lonely solitude with – until, of course, he examines the dog's blood to see that the poodle has the vampire virus, and he collapses in mirthless, bitter laughter. The next scene has PRICE burying the poodle, stake through the heart in his back yard, which should be hysterically funny – but just isn't.

The message to my young mind was absolutely clear. Death, the ultimate monster, strikes little girls and poodles just as cold and merciless as anyone else, including grown-ups. Furthermore, adults had all the cards in their favor – they could push a button and wipe out humanity, draft young men to fight in foreign wars to die in battle or consign their own children to fiery, bottomless pits with a brisk, bureaucratic efficiency.

I wish there was a heartwarming or reassuring thing to share about this monster kid memory, but there isn't any. This horror film had fulfilled its obligation of engaging me, thrilling me and introducing me to certain truths that my own parents, at that time, were themselves too terrified to tell.

AUNT JOHN SEZ: Thanks for the traumafession Greg! To read more by Greg Goodsell, be sure to check out both SCREEM MAGAZINE and ANGELS IN DISTRESS.

Hi all,

I've been a fan of this website for some time now, so I thought I might finally contribute a precious childhood memory of my own. As an Australian child of the ‘80s I was made to watch the classic Australian film DOT AND THE KANGAROO in primary school (it is kind of educational in that it has native animals dancing around and singing about how they got their Latin names), and there was one scene involving a bunyip that always creeped everyone out.

Being an unusual child, this scene was my favourite, but I'll do this traumafession on behalf of all my classmates who weren't as brave as I was. Anyway, the scene starts with NICK CAVE-esque piano intro playing while animated turtles swim over real-life footage of a creek (or billabong) in the outback. Suddenly a hand emerges from the water, then an arm, then an entire Aboriginal Dreamtime monster. The scene is accompanied by an eerily lilting song called 'Bunyip Moon,' and it lulls you into a false sense of calm as the bunyip rampages the bush, chasing people, dingoes and kangaroos through the trees. The whole thing has the feel of a beautiful nightmare as the bunyip curls around the moon, appears in campfires and transforms into a bird.

The true moment of horror is at the very end, when the bunyip's face starts to 'decompose' and transform into a cave painting. That's two seconds that will stay with you for a very, very long time…

Heidi

AUNT JOHN SEZ: Heidi, if it's any consolation to your classmates, they are not alone. Both Mr. Canacorn and Absinthe had similar reactions to that bad ass bunyip.

Dear Uncle L. and Aunt J.,

First of all, you have created a fabulous website. I would like to nominate this site for the "Most Addictive Webpage Ever Award," and if such an award does not exist, it ought to! It is easy to tell that the folks that write in with contributions are dyed-in-the-wool film lovers. (Or possibly DIED-in-the-wool, considering the movies discussed…)

Anyway, my Kindertrauma is the one glaring omission to your movie list. I am referring to the T.V. movie, THE DAY AFTER. The movie features JASON ROBARDS, JOBETH WILLIAMS, JOHN LITHGOW, and totally eighties heartthrob STEVE GUTTENBERG.

When this was broadcast on ABC, I was in junior high school. The Powers That Be decided that all of the students at my school should watch this film so that we could hold a discussion on it in Social Studies the next day. Hey…watching a movie as homework, sounds great!

Well, not so great, after all.

Between shots of people being vaporized by the nuclear blast, a little boy being blinded, and the survivors slowly dying of radiation sickness, this was not a movie for a pre-teen with delicate sensibilities. Other scary films I had seen up to that point had caused oh, maybe a single sleepless night, but this one freaked me out for DAYS! I kept thinking about someone, somewhere, without warning, pushing a few buttons, and plunging the whole world into nuclear Armageddon. Mind you, I think if I would watch the whole movie again as an adult, it would have some Moments of Cheese. But I did pull up the clip of the nuclear strike in Kansas a short time ago, and it still gives me the shivers.

One of the biggest fears I've ever had in my life was of the 1985 Godzilla Inflatable by Imperial Toys!

I am 31 now….and still have a weird fear of it!

I've never been able to explain why…I mean the thing is so silly looking…especially when looking at it from the front!

I think I may have been the eyes…..

As a child I would see this thing everywhere…and even though I was afraid of it…I wanted one! In 2003 I ordered one off of eBay….and I couldn't even open the package!I had to have my friend do it for me (I video taped the whole thing!) But once it was inflated…I wasn't afraid of it anymore.

It's a weird thing…as in if it's right in front of me I'm fine…but if it's put away in a box….or even if I stumble upon a pic of it on the internet…I'm weary of it! There have been a few times when on eBay looking at it….and if the page loads up slow…then BOOM the pic pops up….I jump!

Haha…there was this other time while watching DEMONS 6, you can kinda see it in the shadows in a certain scene……and I was like, "Whoa…it's the Godzilla inflatable!"……but then a few seconds later they have a close up scene of its face! I totally jumped up out of my seat and ran in the other room! Haha…I was 29 at the time by the way!

Soo yeah, that's my Kindertrauma.

There are several versions of this toy:

• The original 1985/86 version
• And three different sized ones from 1992/93: a four foot, five foot…..and AN EIGHT FOOT!!!!!!

I can't even imagine being in the presence of the 8 foot one!

PLUS besides DEMONS 6, it was in: BIG,ARMAGEDDON, IT, & (just slightly in) A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 4… just to name a few…I'm sure it's been in others!

That is all……love the Kindertrauma site.

Thank you!

—Raven J.

UNK SEZ:: That eight foot Godzilla does sound scary. From what I've gathered from the toy box covers the taller the inflatable Godzilla is the more aggressive he acts. It looks like the six ft. tall one (below) is about to rip that kid's head off! Thanks for the mighty traumafession Raven and thanks to GO GO GODZILLA too!

P.S.: Why is it that I have neglected to see DEMONS 6? I gotta get on that!

Hello once more, Unk, Aunt and fellow Traumatots – have you missed me? Since my last two entries on the Groke and Freaky Fred, I have for once NOT been pondering about what else I could think of from my childhood that freaked me out. In fact, I believed I had pretty much covered it all. That is, until a little while ago when a friend of mine, whom I have known for a very long time, told me with a tone of joy in his voice that he had gotten his hands on an old favorite PC game of ours, one we had completed I think maybe six or seven times when we were younger, and one that is probably my favorite of all Adventure games I have ever played. That game is Grim Fandango.

For those who don't know of this awesome game, it is a LucasArts Adventure Game – yes, the same people who made the hilarious Monkey Island series. However, this time, they had the highly imaginative Tim Schaefer with them, who definitely was the one that made the game as unique as it is. Mixing Aztec concepts of the afterlife by having the underworld populated by Calaca-styled skeleton dolls with the crime noir style of detective films, this game had such an enthralling world to explore.

To tell you a little of what it's about, in the game, it is established that when a person dies, he or she must go on a four year journey through the afterlife in order to finally get to The Ninth Underworld, the TRUE afterlife. However, some, like the main character Manny, have done so many bad things in their life that they cannot go before they've worked it off. Therefore, Manny, in the guise of a Grim Reaper, sells "travel packages" to the recently dead, giving them either a car to travel in if they've been good, or a bike… or maybe even just a walking stick and a coffee mug. However, if you have been a great person, you get a train ticket, shortening the 4-year trip to something among the lines of four hours.

However, Manny is distressed – he never seems to get a proper client, and at this pace, he'll never work off his (to us, unknown) deeds. That is, until he finds a woman to whom he can sell a train ticket… only to discover that somehow, despite her perfect life, she seems to not be qualified for one. Someone is stealing the train tickets to the Ninth Underworld and selling them to the rich who don't deserve them – and Manny, in his attempt to figure out the truth, sets out on his own journey to find the one responsible.

Have I mentioned this game is great? Not only is the world so vivid and imaginative, it is also darkly humorous, with many characters whose company you WILL enjoy. Manny himself is a wonderful wisecracker, and like everyone else, he is voiced perfectly. The game was composed of four discs, each of which representing one year of his journey to uncover the truth.

This game, however, also manages to be the only one outside the typical Silent Hill, Resident Evil and other survival horror games that have thoroughly freaked me right the hell out despite its usually amusing tone.

On I think maybe the third year or the beginning of the fourth of Manny's journey, he arrives at the station and the gates to the Ninth Underworld, seeing that the people who got the tickets are simply waiting there, unable to get in thanks to the fraud. When he confronts the Gatekeeper about this, he is told there is nothing they can do, and informs the keeper that the tickets were stolen and sold to others who don't deserve them. At that moment, the train comes, and the Aztec, in an uncaring monotone, simply remarks that now they'll "see what they truly deserve."

And at that moment, I was scared out of my mind.

The train does indeed arrive, and we see one quick shot of the bastard who put you through all this having a little sip of champagne… until the waving sign begins to spin, spin, spin ferociously, turning more and more red before it reveals a devil's face and grows a devil's whipping tail, soon pointing straight down to the abyss far above which the tracks are placed. But oh no, just having the train crash and seeing them fall to their judgment was not horrifying enough. At that very moment, the train grows spikes along what at this point can be described as its spine, and with a horrible sound of screeching metal, it's outsides are scraped off in flames to reveal the face of a menacing, red, mechanically powered dragon – and I swear at that moment, you can still see the horrified skeletal faces of its passengers peeking out from holes in its side – before it leaps off the tracks and straight into a fiery pit.

My God, even if I knew that at some point in the game, Hector LeMans and the ones he sold the tickets to would get their punishment, I was in NO way prepared for the sudden harshness of the judgment, blocky ‘90-ies 3D graphics or not… and it is all topped off by the Aztec-looking gatekeeper sadly shaking his head like he just scolded a few unruly children.

If I remember correctly, this is also what truly sets Manny over the edge, and gets him desperate to settle things once and for all and prevent his client, Mercedes, from suffering the same horrible fate. But I may be wrong – it is so long since I've played it. All I truly remember are the funny sidekick Glottis, the amusing Fire Beaver scene, the giant track running cats… and THIS piece of indescribable horror.

Perhaps I'm weak, but I have yet to see or hear others speak of this scene with as much fear as me. However, I have heard MANY praise the game as one of the best ever, and I shall do the same – you owe it to yourself to play this. You will not regret it.

Just… don't take the train to the neighboring town's game shop. For the love of God, don't take the train.

— Bjarke "Eshbaal" Johansen

Hello again…you posted my "Sgt. Pepper/Aerosmith" trauma a while back so I thought maybe I'd send along another…

Growing up in New Jersey, you have more than your fair share of emotionally-traumatizing pitfalls. Every town, it seems, has a wooded area that is home to Satan worshipers. Abandoned prisons and mental institutions dot the landscape. And don't even ask about what's lurking in the Pine Barrens.

And yet, what to this day traumatized me so much that it STILL causes me to reflexively reach for the channel dial (even when viewed via YouTube on a computer) and STILL sends a cold shiver down my spine at the mere mention of Long Branch, New Jersey? "The Haunted Mansion."

Specifically, this local T.V. ad for the Haunted Mansion.

It starts out with bouncy music and playful images of summer fun. The perfect weekend "down the shore," as we say. Nothing at all wrong with it. But it plants that weird seed in the back of your mind: Why is it called the "Haunted Mansion and Amusement Pier"? Oh, wait…

Then it happens. The shadow on the stairwell. That's what did it. A hunched figure in tattered clothes. Not a remote-controlled dummy, not a plastic mannequin. A REAL THING. Lurching towards the screen and disrupting the sun-drenched playfulness. He's followed by a woman popping out of a coffin. Before my young brain could even process these images…we're back to fun music and bumper cars. Almost like…you didn't see what you think you saw. Move along, folks. Nothing to see here….

Which made the Haunted Mansion THAT MUCH MORE TERRIFYING. Does it exist? If so, why did they cut away so quickly? Is it REAL? Who is that man lurking in the stairwell? OH MY GOD, TURN IT OFF.

Researching this clip, I swear, the opening "For a day you'll never forget…" almost stopped me cold. I hit pause and seriously considered whether or not I could play the whole thing…I could almost hear my older brother making fun of me and vowing to drag me to the Haunted Mansion…

UNK SEZ:: Ack! EA, your traumafession reminded me of my own personal experiences with a commercial for Brigantine Castle. I tracked it down and egad, it's got the very same hunchback shadow guy in it!

The scariest part of the Brigantine commercial for me was the skeleton arm chasing Rhoda. I was sure she was going to get pushed over the wall to her death!