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Name That Horror Movie!

August 18th, 2017 by unkle lancifer · 14 Comments

Here are ten images from ten horror movies. How many can you identify? Extra points for figuring out what they all have in common. Good luck!

→ 14 CommentsTags: Kindertrauma Funhouse

Name That Trauma:: Dennis A. on B&W Quintuplets

August 14th, 2017 by unkle lancifer · 1 Comment

It was an old B&W horror about identical quint boys who are about 10yo. 4 of them were adopted out to good families. But at 10 they start getting terrorized and murdered. Turns out it was by the 5th baby. The grandmother comes forward and explains that #5 killed her young daughter so she threw the baby into the ocean to die.

Can you name this movie? My friend told me she has looked for the name for years!

→ 1 CommentTags: Name That Trauma!

Sunday Streaming:: Extinction (2015) (Via Crackle)

August 13th, 2017 by unkle lancifer · 1 Comment

I gravitated toward EXTINCTION not because I’m a huge zombie fan but because I have a warm spot for snowbound horror. I caught the icy trailer on a random DVD and I couldn’t understand why I had never heard of it before and then fortuitously, a couple weeks later, it popped up at a yard sale because I’m the luckiest person in the world. Now EXTINCTION is on CRACKLE and I am strongly urging you to check it out. It’s one of my favorite finds of the last ten years and it’s the type of movie I’ll watch again and again. If I had to make a list of underrated horror films, I think I’d put it smack on the top. I want this movie to be my pet so I can pat it on the head and it can sit in front of my fireplace. Do you know how many zombie movies I don’t care about? I’d say about 97%. This one is particularly unique and it has interesting characters and the atmosphere is through the roof. You have to see the shot of an abandoned, snow-covered movie theater with a marque that reads “AT THE MOUNTAINS OF MADNESS.” It’s so darn beautiful…

The less you know the better so I’ll just throw a couple selling points at you and hope it will be enough. The bulk of this movie takes place about ten years after a zombie-type outbreak wipes out most of civilization. The tale follows two adult survivors (MATTHEW FOX, JEFFREY DONOVAN– both excellent), a little girl (QUINN McCOLGAN) and a faithful doggie. These folks are holed up in a couple of adjacent houses in the middle of nowhere covered in ice and hoping never to see a zombie again (in truth, the creatures are never called such and are referred to as simply “monsters”). The two men have had a falling out but they both feel responsible for the little girl and eventually they have to reconcile in order to persevere. Slowly we learn the details of the slight that divided them and it becomes a genuinely compelling character driven drama. Of course the monsters return, as they always do, and there are some real nail-biting action sequences as this likable group fights to survive. In some ways, it’s more faithful to the homebound isolated terrors of RICHARD MATHESON’s I AM LEGEND than previous official adaptions. Plus, I kinda just want to live in this movie were modern culture is dead, everything is covered in snow and I’m in a boarded up house filled with books eating beans out of a can.

Watch EXTINCTION right HERE for free thanks to the folks at CRACKLE.

→ 1 CommentTags: Stream Warriors · Streaming Alert! · Sunday Streaming

Annabelle: Creation (2017)

August 12th, 2017 by unkle lancifer · No Comments

I thought the previous ANNABELLE (2014) movie was an entertaining enough diversion but I can’t say I remember much of it. I may have passed up its new prequel ANNABELLE: CREATION altogether but then I heard they were showing a 4-minute sneak peek of IT introduced by STEPHEN KING himself and that sealed the deal (btw, I was mesmerized by every frame of the IT preview). Did I just say I almost passed up ANNABELLE: CREATION? That’s a total lie. If someone makes a killer doll movie, I’m going to go see it. That is my duty and I will beg, borrow and steal to accomplish my goal. In any case, my expectations were not the highest but I ended up thoroughly pleased. I’m not saying you should grab your coat and keys right this second and run out the door to see it but if you are looking for solid late summer chills, it’s super generous in handing them out. There’s some seriously spooky business gong on in this movie and that freaky looking doll is only the tip of the iceberg. If you enjoy a good haunted house or possession film this baby delivers both. Not to spoil anything but they also throw in a damn animated scarecrow as if there weren’t enough satanic shenanigans going on. Really, it’s like watching five horror films at once and I’m completely down with that. It gets a little too chaotic for its own good at some points but I’m not one to look a demonic gift horse in the mouth.

What really elevates this film from the standard franchise extension is its setting and characters and the obvious talents of its director DAVID F. SANDBERG (LIGHTS OUT) and cinematographer MAXIME ALEXANDRE (HIGH TENSION). Director SANDBERG really knows how to torture you with silent, empty spaces and ALEXANDRE makes half of this movie resemble a gorgeous painting. The heart of the film is a friendship between two young orphan girls (TALITHA BATEMAN and LULU WISON) and the actresses are both super effective at convincing you of their tight bond. There’s a scene in which the two trade dolls when they realize they will be separated and it’s really rather moving because the acting is so real and unaffected. Plus, I’m sure I’ve mentioned this before here but I can really get into a horror house and this movie not only offers up a glorious, painstakingly detailed gothic wonder but also a miniaturized dollhouse version that likes to light up on its own from time to time. Before I make this all sound too precious, let me tell you there are some seriously alarming monsters roaming these halls. I’m talking clawed, glowing-eyed demons that shapeshift, melt into the darkness and burn into your noggin like the cover of an early eighties horror paperback. Even if you’re not a fan of ANNABELLE’s first outing this one is a pretty safe bet and if the lady who sat behind me screaming was here, I’m pretty sure she’d say the same.

→ No CommentsTags: General Horror · Traumatots

Name That Movie! (Hosted by Matt Sunshine)

August 11th, 2017 by unkle lancifer · 37 Comments

Hey, it’s Freaky Friday and me and Matt Sunshine Have switched places! Matt knows all the answers and I know none! How many of these mystery film images kindly provided by Matt Sunshine can you identify?

→ 37 CommentsTags: Kindertrauma Funhouse

Name That Trauma:: Maria M. on a Shocking Cartoon

August 9th, 2017 by unkle lancifer · 8 Comments

Hello. I am from Spain and I just discovered you. I was looking up the hot sauce scene from SpongeBob and found a trauma confession about it. I do not believe people got scared about it. I thought it was funny.

However there was something I was scared about when I was a little girl. I do not remember which cartoon it was in.

It was the early 1990’s and I was on a vacation to America with my parents. We stayed at hotel in Massachusetts and I wanted to watch cartoons. So I turned on Nickelodeon. At the time, I believe it was America only.

They were showing a cartoon about a cute animal with cute voice but I did not understand a lot of it because it was all in English. The episode I watched had him trying not to touch a button. As time passes, he can not take it any more and touches it. At first nothing happened but then he had his eyes closed and opened them to reveal hideous red spiral eyes. Accompanying it was noise that sounded like a burst of electricity if someone interpreted it on synthesizer.

When I saw his eyes, I screamed and turned the channel. I did not have nightmares but I remember thinking Massachusetts was little creepy for the rest of the stay. I also felt very sad for the poor animal because he looked very cute and I wondered what kind of person would do that thing to him. I’m 29 now and I hope it won’t be that scary as I remember it to be.

-Maria M.

→ 8 CommentsTags: Name That Trauma!

Traumafession:: Miyamoto Y. on Fatal Frame and Bimbo’s Initiation

August 7th, 2017 by unkle lancifer · 1 Comment

Hi there! I am Miyamoto from Japan and a friend in the US told me about this site. I must say, there’s a lot of good stuff on here! Glad you know about Matango and “Kinderpal Bigwig on Pigmon” was f*cking funny! I used to watch Ultraman reruns as a kid here in the country the show originated, and I can’t believe people were freaked out by Pigmon. I always found him stupid. (“He spoke Monster.” I CANNOT BREATHE)

Growing up in Japan I don’t believe it that nothing scared me, as a child and now. I was always fearless and the closest I was to ever being scared was when a bat flew in my window when I was 11.

I think I played some games that scared me, though! Fatal Frame was one of them. But it wasn’t a lasting trauma.

Ha Ha, It’s Burl!’s post was very hilarious, especially “the Maurice Sendak bedroom forest” (excuse me while I develop asthma).

I recommend that Unk and John watch “Bimbo’s Initiation“, that’s my Kindertrauma Recommendation for today! I see you covered “Pigs is Pigs” which was another inspiration.

See you around!

→ 1 CommentTags: Traumafessions

Sunday Streaming:: Tobe Hooper’s Eaten Alive (1977) (Via Viewster)

August 6th, 2017 by unkle lancifer · No Comments

TOBE HOOPER’s EATEN ALIVE knows how to creep me out. The opening music alone is a swirling miasma of otherworldly chirps and moans that can turn any hour of the day into half past midnight. I know some folks have a hard time digesting its fluorescent fever dream atmosphere after THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE’s gritty and grounded approach but I love the contrast. It’s like the difference between ROB ZOMBIE’s neon hallucination HOUSE OF 1000 CORPSES and his earthy neo-western THE DEVIL’S REJECTS but in reverse. What I love most about EATEN ALIVE though is HOOPER’s mad genius decision to film the movie entirely on a soundstage complete with an indoor pool masquerading as a swamp. The end result is that everything that occurs has a surreal and artificial aura about it. I’m guessing the prevalent tone of vague falseness is enough to turn some viewers off but I love it. It feels like old Hollywood mixed with that terrible (or relieving) moment in a nightmare when you realize you’re not in reality. It’s eerie, strange and bonkers and I wrote a longer review probably using many of the same adjectives HERE. More importantly, EATEN ALIVE is available to watch for free over at this joint that calls itself VIEWSTER right over HERE. If you’re in the mood to inject some raving mad lunacy into your day, it’ll certainly do the trick.

→ No CommentsTags: Sunday Streaming

Name That TV Guide Ad! (Featuring: Are You in the House Alone? A TV Movie Compendium: 1964-1999 Edited by Amanda Reyes)

August 4th, 2017 by unkle lancifer · 22 Comments

NOTE: Today’s images come courtesy of our dear chum, TV movie historian extraordinaire Amanda Reyes. Amanda’s new book ARE YOU IN THE HOUSE ALONE? A TV MOVIE COMPENDIUM: 1964-1999 is available now and that strange weeping noise you can’t identify at night is probably your bookshelf begging for it. This book is the ultimate tribute to the TV movies that have had such a profound effect on our psyches and I’m not just saying that because I contributed a few pieces (You know I had to call out SALEM’S LOT for delivering me many a sleepless night). This book is jammed packed with TV movie goodness from the legendary to the obscure and Amanda’s retrospective to the small screen horror films of the late, great WES CRAVEN is worth the price alone. Buy this beauty HERE and plan to be fully occupied with essays, reviews and plenty of cool TV GUIDE ads for a long while.

→ 22 CommentsTags: Amanda By Night · Kindertrauma Funhouse

Name That Trauma:: Bridget N. on a Creepy Cult

August 3rd, 2017 by unkle lancifer · 7 Comments

Hi! My brother and I have been trying to search for an older movie that scared the crap out of us when we were children. We both remember it might have been made anytime between the 70’s to the early 90’s. It was about two guys travelling by bus in a foreign country and they get stranded in a small poor village. All the villagers are devil worshippers and the two guys witness a sacrifice and ritual one night and are terrified. One of them, we think, was captured and tortured. That is all we remember, but we would really like to find out what that movie may be! Any ideas?? *Note this movie is NOT Race With the Devil or Midnight.

→ 7 CommentsTags: Name That Trauma!