kindertrauma

Name That Trauma :: Reader Andrew D. on a Dirty Deal With the Devil

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Have a trauma question.

O.K., love your sight by the way, it has helped me in the past.

O.K., so I think this was a PBS T.V. movie, most likely at least. Anyway, it takes place around the 1800s or so. This guy (possibly a soldier) has a meeting with the Devil while walking down the road. The Devil gives him this coat which is magical; it will never run out of money. The catch is the man must not take a bath, shave, trim his nails, etc. for a year or maybe more.

At first he parties and has the time of his life. But soon as he gets smelly he is forced to go stay in barns, etc. At this one farmhouse he helps out the owner with money in exchange for letting him stay there. The farmer promises him his daughter in marriage. He makes her a ring out of his nail trimmings. In the end he wins the contest, the Devil cleans him and he marries the girl.

Any help? I saw it probably 15 or more years ago.

UNK SEZ: Andrew, my hair stood on end when I read your Name That Trauma because I came across this same production on PBS at roughly the same time. You remembered a lot more concrete details than I did, but the time period and the deal with the devil rang a bell with me. I had too little to go on myself but with your added information, it seems I have solved this mystery for both of us!

It's called BEARSKIN, OR THE MAN WHO DIDN'T WASH FOR SEVEN YEARS. It's based on a story by THE BROTHERS GRIMM and it's a short film (20 min.) that was frequently shown in classrooms and on PBS. Even better, I found a clip that brought the memories flooding back which you can see below.

Thanks Andrew, I would never have found this without you!

Piranha (1978)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

On the surface, 1978's PIRANHA may look like a throw away JAWS rip off but thanks to the talents involved, it's a B-movie masterstroke that lovingly recalls the monster movie heyday of the fifties. I have fond memories of PIRANHA's television premiere and the spirited frenzy of conversation it spawned at the elementary school bus stop the next day. With a theatrical remake around the corner (a cable version was made in 1995) directed by HIGH TENSION's ALEXANDRE AJA and presented in 3-D, I think it's high time we take a look back and examine just what made this ROGER CORMAN produced classic so special…

JOE DANTE

In 1978, director JOE DANTE was in peak form and poised to deliver a string of hits including THE HOWLING, GREMLINS and undoubtedly the most imaginative segment of TWILIGHT ZONE: THE MOVIE. His collage of cartoon humor, twisted gore and blatant self-awareness are commonplace today, but only because DANTE paved the way.

JOHN SAYLES

He would later move on to become Oscar bait (LONE STAR, PASSION FISH) but thank God he spent some time in the trenches and gifted B-movie fans the likes of ALLIGATOR, BATTLE BEYOND THE STARS and his two collaborations with DANTE, THE HOWLING and PIRANHA.

PINO DONAGGIO

Can you ask for a better composer then the guy who did CARRIE? (Not to mention DRESSED TO KILL, DON'T LOOK NOW and TOURIST TRAP among countless others.) I know I can't.

LOVABLE HEROES

A drunk (BRADFORD DILLMAN of BUG and THE MEPHISTO WALTZ) and a snoopy reporter (HEATHER MENZIES from SSSSSSS), who let's face it, cause the entire piranha problem themselves by foolishly emptying a pool at a research facility. Extra props for the quickest "How do you do? Let's screw!" this side of JOHN CARPENTER's THE FOG.

INDELIBLE SCENES

Years of psychotherapy are predicted for this kid who watches helplessly as his dad becomes fish food and what about that old guy whose feet get eaten off?

KINDERTRAUMA IN ACTION

That drunk's kid is rightfully hydrophobic but that doesn't stop her from jumping on an inflatable raft and saving her favorite camp counselor (frequent DANTE player BELINDA BALASKI.) Way to overcome your fears Suzie!

KEVIN McCARTHY

Here's a tip, if KEVIN McCARTHY (INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS ‘56) warns you about something, no matter how outlandish it sounds, BELIEVE HIM.

BARBARA STEELE

I'll let this legend's eyes do the talking.

PAUL BARTEL

I know he's supposed to be a jerk in this but who can hate the one and only PAUL BARTEL?

DICK MILLER

What JOE DANTE movie would be complete without this guy?

THAT WEIRD SOUND THE PIRANHA MAKE

Forget the JAWS theme, I'm all about the crazy whirly whirl sound that tells you that you are currently being chomped on by a school of killer PIRANHA!

LATE SEVENTIES FASHION

Really? People walked around like this?

AND FINALLY THIS GUY…

So many questions: Who is he? What does he know? When does he get his own movie? Where can I buy one? Can I feed him after midnight?

Traumafessions :: Crankenstein of Cranky Town on Pinocchio

Posted on By aunt john

Hey Kindertrauma, haven't had anything good to report to you in awhile, but the other day during my humanities class I take at City College S.F., I remembered something horrible while we watched PINOCCHIO.

Most of the horrors I've experienced for some reason branch out from that film although I've never seen the connection ‘till now and I'll just mention one of them.

There is a square quilt blanket PINOCCHIO sleeps with that I had as a child, which reminded me of something awful. After a dinner where I had spaghetti and meatballs and a cake and a bunch of other crap I can't remember, I went to bed and had a terrible nightmare. I dreamt that I was eating the hugest strawberry chocolate chip cake (like a mountain-sized cake) and no matter what happened I couldn't finish it.

While I was half asleep all I can remember was puking all over the quilt as I slept; puke and go back to sleep; puke some more. I slept under a mountain of my own puke and for some reason didn't wake up until morning, maybe it was so heavy I couldn't move and no one could help me, even though my sister was asleep in the same room.

Christ who would want to help me?

I have successfully avoided seeing PINOCCHIO since I was 3 or 4 years old when it horrified me in the theater and all the anxieties that I felt throughout my life were harnessed into reality and I forgot how dark and sinister most of that film was.

Then I wondered if kids today would not be so sheltered from reality then possibly they could learn something, either way it's an important film. The reason we watched it during Humanities class was because my brilliant teacher saw a connection between Jesus and PINOCCHIO (both die and become resurrected, "to save one's own life you must lose it.")

Check it out again with this frame of mind and see what you get, it could also be applied to BRITNEY SPEARS puppet-like existence as well.

AUNT JOHN SEZ: Thanks for checking in Crankenstein of CRANKY TOWN. If it's any consolation, the Vicar of VHS shares a somewhat similar aversion to this cautionary tale about a piece of wood who's turned into a boy and then turned into a donkey before finally being turned back into a boy.

Traumafessions :: Reader D. on Alfred Hitchcock Presents ep. "Final Escape"

Posted on By aunt john

I love your site!

It brought back a flood of scary T.V./movie memories, particularly that my sister and I were obsessed with watching ALFRED HITCHCOCK PRESENTS on Sunday nights in the mid-‘80s, followed (or preceded) by STEVEN SPIELBERG's AMAZING STORIES which were often VERY disturbing and kept us up at night.

There was one ALFRED HITCHCOCK PRESENTS called "Final Escape" that still creeps us out to this day. It was about a rich, mean woman who gets sent to jail and where she strikes a deal with the elderly prison coroner. She promises to pay for his expensive eye surgery (I think) if he buries her with the next inmate who dies and then comes back to dig her up. They agree that the next time the death bell tolls she will climb into the casket and wait for him to come and get her after the burial.

Before long, the bell tolls, she sneaks into the morgue area and gets into the casket and gets buried in the prison graveyard. She waits and waits and waits, but the prison coroner doesn't come. After a while, she lights a match and finds herself lying next to the DEAD coroner!!!! Zoom out to hearing screams coming from the ground.

Shivers!!!

Does anyone else remember this series/episode?

Keep up the good work!!

D.

AUNT JOHN SEZ: Thanks D. for the sweet traumafession! While I don't recall that particular episode, I did manage to locate a clip from the '60s ALFRED HITCHCOCK HOUR on which the plot of the '80s re-hash is based:

Name That Trauma :: Reader Sebastian on a Hit & Run Hag

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Hey guys and girls,

Great site, I thought perhaps you could help me with my own scary vague memory/trauma from childhood.

I saw it sometime in the early ‘90s, but the film might be a bit older. The scene I remember is when the main characters, a man and a woman, are trying to escape from a village where some bad stuff has taken place (which I can't remember…)

So they're in the car driving away but don't seem to be getting anywhere. In fact, they keep passing this creepy old lady on a creepy old bicycle. They can't escape, everything just repeats itself, and they aren't getting any further from the bad place.

At one point they actually hit the old lady on her bike; the two people get out of the car to check if she's alright, but she's dead. They stand there for a bit discussing what to do, then when they turn back to the body of the old lady, she's gone…

This is all I remember, it would be so great if you knew per chance where this scene is from, I would love to relive it.

Keep up the good work!

Sebastian

UNK SEZ: I might be wrong here, but I think you're talking about JOHN CARPENTER's IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS. It's actually an old man that gets hit and seems to momentarily disappear, but I've heard him being mistaken for an old woman before (probably due to the long hair.) He's shown as a young boy at first but as he tries to escape the town of Hobb's End he appears to turn into an old man. After he is hit, he says in a young boy's voice, "They won't let me out."

It may be the creepiest scene in the film and the way its shot is truly nightmarish. I also wonder if it was a partial inspiration for this scary (and Kindertraumatic) music video from BATS FOR LASHES…

The Burrowers

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Regardless of the sparkling buzz, I have been avoiding THE BURROWERS. Yes, I'm shallow, the DVD case turned me off and I feared it was going to be some dusty, sepia-toned worm-run-amuck movie (although come to think of it, that doesn't sound so bad.) What finally piqued my curiosity was learning that it spawned from the mind of J.T. PETTY who made the compact, claustrophobic and marvelously against the grain MIMIC 3: THE SENTINEL. (Add that fact to the film's current hand reach availability on Fearnet and my being semi-voluntarily confined to an ALF snuggie and you have yourself a sealed deal.)

Hooray for my noodle limp resolve, THE BURROWERS is worm free, my new crush JOCELIN DONAHUE (THE HOUSE OF THE DEVIL) is in the first scene (though not much more), and rather than being crusty and dusty, it's a beautifully shot film that answers that question nobody ever asked, " What if TERRENCE MALICK directed ALIEN?"

Now before you slip on your Sketchers and run to the video store, I mean mailbox, I mean computer or remote (if you should also have Fearnet) let me warn you that this movie paces itself much like a classic western so it requires a certain amount of patience. This means no squirmy monster dessert until you've eaten all your peas! The peas here are pretty tasty and fortifying though, you might just like them.

When a frontier family disappears in the dead of night it's reckoned by all that it must be the work of Indians. A search party is formed that includes a young Irish immigrant named Fergus (likable MIMIC 3 star KARL GEARY) whose heart belongs to one of the missing. As the group of men ventures further into the wild they discover that their assumptions are way off and that something sinister is UNDER foot.

As if creatures that poison and then bury their victims underground only to chomp on their "soft bits" later were not bad enough, our rag tag cavalry is plagued with willful ignorance, covert agendas and a douche-y guy who purposely mistranslates the native tongue to suit his own needs. Yep, a bit more effort in the communication department may have saved some lives here folks, that and a smidge of respect for the land. See, the "burrowers" used to dine on buffalo but with no more buffalo around eating humans is their only recourse. Don't judge, desperation can make you eat anything; how else can you explain airplane food? (ba-dum-bump!)

THE BURROWERS slowly unspools the suspense, like the aforementioned ALIEN it mischievously plays with darkness and shadow to keep the viewer on edge. There's also a rather compelling drama here about a group of men playing king of the hill to their own detriment. It even ultimately touches upon accepting loss and the fact that some things just can't be made right again thanks to the larger powers at play. It also stars the one and only CLANCY BROWN, maybe I should have mentioned that in the first place.

Traumafessions :: Reader Nita M. on Dumbo

Posted on By aunt john

Hi, as I'm sure you've heard before, your website is fantastic. Lots of fun for the horror lover. Anyway, I was wondering if anyone has mentioned DUMBO as a traumafession. Though I visit regularly, I'm sure I could've missed it.

For me, DUMBO (like many a Disney film) was quite upsetting. I was very little of course when I first saw it and even with its scary moments, I liked it and watched it a lot but that didn't mean I walked away psychologically unscathed. From the time poor Mrs. Jumbo had to watch all the other mother's get their babies while she stood all by herself, hopes rising and falling like the ridiculous temperature out here in Northern Cali, to those snooty, gossipy, elephant companions they were forced to bunk with, all the way to the near end, when the feather slipped out of DUMBO's grasp and he nearly died painted up as a clown, I couldn't help pondering why all of this was happening.

It was all so unjustified, especially when that horrid kid teased little baby DUMBO and got a well deserved spanking from Mrs. Jumbo, only for her to end up in jail (I guess Disney, like local law enforcement, don't sit well with spankin's ) I mean it was so sad and depressing.

Of course, no mention of the film DUMBO can go without the discussion of the 'Pink Elephant' sequence. Though it was horrifying, I thought it was pretty cool, just like Asian Horror is today! But my friends sure didn't think so. A couple had to leave the room when it came on and one's own mother forbid them to watch that part, she always fast forwarded it while telling us to close our eyes. I didn't blame them. The parts where the elephant is made up of heads and the high pitched voices are singing, is completely and understandably frightening.

As I've said, it was the emotional turmoil that got to me…that and DUMBO as a clown, I swear that image just won't go away! Oh well, I've come to realize that it's really not so bad being traumatized, slightly enjoyable even.

That's all for me, thanks for reading!

Luv,

Nita