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...:::Sunday Streaming:::...

Easter Sunday Movie:: Dolls (1987) (Via Comet TV)

April 16th, 2017 · 2 Comments

Hey it’s Easter Sunday so it’s likely many of you are hanging out with a giant bunny. But just in case some of you fine folks need something to watch later, let me inform you that our pals at COMET TV will be airing a favorite of mine this afternoon, STUART GORDON’S 1987 masterwork DOLLS! Oh how I love everything about this movie! I love the old dark house atmosphere, the beautifully done stop-motion special effects, the cast of charming character actors, the well-timed appearance of video vixens, the creepiness, the music box score and I love that it’s short, sweet and to the point like any good fable. I also love that it’s all about the tragedy of transforming into a douchebag and losing touch with hope, imagination and your inner, not a narrow minded selfish jerk yet, child. I wrote a review for this gem way back HERE but I think I like the movie even more now than I did back then. In fact, I’d dare say it’s in my top twenty favorite horror movies- I love it that much. I mean it’s got a giant killer teddy bear in it for crying out loud. Giant killer teddy bears are way cooler than giant rabbits! If you haven’t seen it before give it a watch and if you have seen it before know that it holds up to infinite viewings and watch it again! You’ll find it RIGHT HERE at 4pm ET! Hop to it! You’ll be hoppy you did!

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Tags: Sunday Streaming

Sunday Movie:: The Immortalizer (1989)

April 9th, 2017 · No Comments

I swear I had every intention of broadening my horizons beyond COMET TV this weekend but how can I when they perpetually insist upon showing such awesome stuff? I can’t escape! Tonight they are showing this weird obscure cult-ready fiasco called THE IMMORTALIZER from 1989 (1990?). From what I can tell everybody and their mother hates this movie except me. I caught it on MGM HD in the wee hours about two or three years ago and it was basically everything I wanted it to be and then some. It’s got that weird uncomfortable tortured captive thing that you might find in HELLHOLE or MANSION OF THE DOOMED but it’s also got that campy search for eternal youth plotline that you might recognize from DEATH BECOMES HER, ETERNAL EVIL, SKELETON KEY and this year’s critically acclaimed GET OUT. Plus it’s pretty darn hilarious in its brazen ineptitude and slightly sleazy vulgarity. Did I mention it takes place in the same building as SORORITY MASSACRE PART 2 (More on that HERE)? In any case, the important thing here is that this may be your last chance to see THE IMMORTALIZER for a while. It doesn’t seem to be readily available in any format and it doesn’t look like it’s going to be building a demand for such a thing any time soon. Check it out while you can right HERE at 6 (ET/PT) before it sips away! You’re not getting any younger!

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Tags: Sunday Streaming

Sunday Movie:: The Video Dead (1987) (Via Comet TV)

April 2nd, 2017 · 1 Comment

There is no reason to leave the house today! There is nothing out there in the sun. As long as you have popcorn for popping you should be all set. You see, the generous folks at COMET TV are showing THE VIDEO DEAD at 4! Let me tell you, THE VIDEO DEAD is a true one of a kind flick. It’s sometimes legit creepy, sometimes legit hilarious and all the time legit charming. It’s never stingy with the gore and the surprisingly impressive special effects and some of the ghouls shambling about have some serious personality (wait till you meet the bride)! There’s a sweet homegrown backyard feel to this 1987 straight to video release but it runs at a good clip and features more creative set pieces than a dozen Hollywood productions. Mostly, it’s just pure unadulterated eighties-style fun and the fact that writer/director ROBERT SCOTT never went on to make another horror movie is a crime against the undead. Check out this suburban nightmare on your computer (at 4) HERE or rumor has it you can now find COMET TV on that newfangled ROKU device! What will they think of next? COMET has me feeling like I’m reliving the glorious UHF days of my youth (aw, channel 48 how I miss you!). I’ll be watching on my rabbit ear set with the glow in dark skull on top as it is the most likely to have a zombie pop out of it!

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Tags: Sunday Streaming

Sunday Movie:: Train to Busan (2016) (Via Netflix Streaming)

March 26th, 2017 · 2 Comments

We’re having some technical difficulties (gremlin outbreak) so today’s Sunday streaming recommendation will be short and sweet. If you have NETFLIX (and why would anybody not?), you must promise your old pal Unk that you will watch the South Korean end of the world zombie nightmare movie TRAIN TO BUSAN! Even if you think you’ve seen it all before in the zombie outbreak arena, I can assure you that TRAIN TO BUSAN will blow that notion out of your mind. It’s all kinds of thrilling and suspenseful for sure but it also packs a surprisingly gargantuan wallop in the emotional department as well. No, those were not tears streaming down my face at the end of the movie; I just had something in my eye! Even if you don’t usually seek out subtitled movies, please make an exception in this case. I guarantee shortly you’ll be way too wrapped up in the action to notice. If you need more enticement you can check out the trailer HERE but I’d jump on board knowing as little as possible if I were you. This is a keeper, folks! Make sure you don’t miss it!

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Sunday Movie:: Dead of Winter (1987) (Via Comet TV)

March 19th, 2017 · 6 Comments

Here comes one last icy blast of winter! Let me tell ya, one of my most favorite memories of seeing a movie in the theater was when I first saw DEAD OF WINTER way back in the olden days. My first year of college I had no TV but I happened to be renting a room in a small town that had a movie theater that showed second run movies all week and had a magic show on the weekends (shout out to the incredible Cabot Street Theater in Beverly, Mass!). It was great because I went and saw basically everything they played regardless of genre and they changed their movies several times a week.

DEAD OF WINTER has some kind of moody goth-lite charisma that hits me exactly where I grimly live. I’ve been fascinated by cold and distant HITCHCOCK-worshiping, high-maintenance psychological thrillers since 1982 when I became the world’s first and only STILL OF THE NIGHT super-fan. Nothing butters my bread better than a dark and stormy night, a female lead who may or may not be losing her mind and a big old dark creepy house with plenty of visual details to repeatedly explore. If the lady in question is playing multiple roles as the great MARY STEENBURGEN does in this, that’s all the better. Sign me, my cat, my STAR WARS blanket and my whiskey up!

This is one of those special movies that I feel I have to have on both DVD and VHS; the DVD is for serious viewing and the VHS is for me to fall asleep to. Is that wrong? I can’t help it. I love it so. DEAD OF WINTER is all about what happens when you loose your identity trying to be all things to all people (a goldfish in a plastic bag- best symbolism ever!) and how you can never, ever trust people like RODDY McDOWALL. It’s directed by the brilliant ARTHUR PENN (BONNIE AND CLYDE) and am I the only person who thinks STEENBURGEN looks exactly like KATE BUSH? There’s a scene in DOW where she struggles to climb up a steep wooded hillside and every time I watch it I hear BUSH’s “Running up that Hill” in my head. This is one of those go-to comfort movies that I return to over and over again. If you have never had the pleasure before, check it out on COMET TV today at 2pm HERE!

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Tags: Sunday Streaming

Sunday Movie:: Night of the Living Dead (1990) (Via Crackle)

March 12th, 2017 · 2 Comments

TOM SAVINI’s 1990 refurbishing of his buddy GEORGE ROMERO’s immortal NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD has got to be one of the most underrated remakes of all time. I’m not surprised folks were skeptical before it hit the big screen but I’m more than a little shocked anyone was able to cling to their cynicism by the time the end credits rolled. It’s so darn good! Personally, I thought I had witnessed the vital birth of a Ripley-esque heroine in the revamped Barbara (PATRICIA TALLMAN) and I was stunned to later find critics giving the whole rip-roaring anti-adventure a cold dismissal (How could you, EBERT?). What’s worse, even horror fans shrugged it off and snidely shunned it. I have faith that most of those naysayers have changed their tune by now but how could they be so blind in the first place? Ugh, I guess some people really need to trash some things in order to prove their love for other things, which is pretty stupid because you can easily love both!

Every remake has its work cut out for it and this particular one had some extra big shoes (or coffins) to fill. Is it possible people were extra biased because they figured special effects guru SAVANI would deliver the ultimate gorefest? Well it just so happens, I like my undead like I like my everything- and that’s on a small scale and in a very limited space. SAVINI cut his directorial teeth directing TALES FROM THE DARKSIDE episodes and that could explain part of my mad devotion; something about that series singularly scratches a psychological itch for me. SAVINI’s take almost feels like an extended DARKSIDE episode and that’s so up my nightmare alley. I’m not the type who thinks SAVINI walks on water but I have to say whoever is responsible for this particular end product has got some serious chops. The score even has that strange minimalist keyboard routine going on and the meager budget insures everything remains looking backyard regional and lived in. The atmosphere is so convincingly nihilistic and morbidly depressing that the entire excursion acts as a cathartic purging of negative vibes. And how can anyone look a gift horse in the mouth when its front teeth are genre legends TONY TODD and BILL MOSLEY? Meanwhile, a motion picture is worth more than a zillion words and you can check this fine flick out for FREE thanks to super cuddly CRACKLE right abouts HERE!

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Tags: Sunday Streaming

Sunday Movie:: After Midnight (1989) (Via Comet TV)

March 5th, 2017 · No Comments

I don’t ask for much out of this universe, I just ask that every human person who I interact with at some point watches the 1989 horror anthology AFTER MIDNIGHT. If you’ve been playing hard to get in regards to this simple request today is the day that you can heed my plea with relative ease because AFTER MIDNIGHT is going to be on COMET TV! As I mentioned long ago HERE, there was a point in my young adult life when AFTER MIDNIGHT was my very own “Name That Trauma”! I once fatefully fell asleep in front of the boob tube and woke up to the segment involving a gaggle of girls being hunted down by ferocious dogs in the big city. I was in a half conscious, semi-dream state and the whole business seemed like a televised nightmare. It took me years (and the rise of the internet) for me to track this movie down and tattoo its title permanently inside my head. Frankly folks, you shouldn’t need me to tell you to watch every PAMELA ALDON (GREASE 2, THE GATE 2) movie you possibly can. AFTER MIDNIGHT starts at 6pm but I plan to be handcuffed to the TV long before that as COMET will also be sharing LUCKY McKEE’s ode to SUSPIRIA, THE WOODS (2006) at 2 and the Kindertrauma classic BURNT OFFERINGS at 4! Don’t fret if you don’t have a TV set, the very same parade of horror awesomeness is going down smack-dab HERE!!!

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Tags: Sunday Streaming

Sunday Movie:: Strange Invaders (1983) (Via Comet TV)

February 26th, 2017 · 1 Comment

I’ve got a fantastic flick for y’all but I better tell you about it fast because it’s going to be on soon! At 2pm today, good old COMET is going to be airing 1983’s STRANGE INVADERS and you can watch it for free just by clicking HERE! I’m not going to lie to you, even though it’s always spot on with the smoky pastel visuals and appreciative winks towards 1950’s sci-fi, STRANGE INVADERS starts out kinda syrupy slow (I’m not down with the droopy score or milquetoast lead PAUL LE MAT)… BUT if you are patient you will be rewarded with absolutely awesome eighties make-up effects and the infatuating likes of WALLACE SHAWN, FIONA LEWIS, LOUISE FLETCHER and most importantly, the worship-worthy NANCY ALLEN! Seriously, as soon as ALLEN shows up it’s like you’re watching a whole new movie! Now if you should happen to come by this notice late, don’t fret; at 4pm COMET is airing KILLER KLOWNS FROM OUTER SPACE! What a great double feature!

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Tags: Sunday Streaming

Sunday Streaming:: The Boogey Man (1980)

February 19th, 2017 · 3 Comments

Hold up now, did you realize that there is absolutely nothing to stop you from watching 1980’s THE BOOGEYMAN for free on super swell and generous CRACKLE (HERE)? Please don’t tell me you’re one of those people trying to rewrite history and claim this movie doesn’t rule. That’s nonsense. C’mon, if being derivative of HALLOWEEN and THE EXORCIST is a crime than you’re going to have to lock up my entire movie collection! I know director ULLI LOMMEL went on to squander his talent churning out lamentable chaff but I’m going to forever contend that there’s some creepy as hell miasma emanating from this partially silly motion picture. The opening theme alone is enough to make me feel like I walked into some sleazy, unfathomable supernatural hive of unmitigated wrongness. Plus, what about that crazy shish kabob car kill? What about that annoying kid being rightfully guillotined in the bathroom window? What about that scary dude with the panty hose on his head? Eh, I give up. Watch it for the soundtrack alone for heavens sake! So good!

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Tags: Sunday Streaming

Sunday Movie:: Mom (1991) (Via Comet TV)

February 12th, 2017 · 3 Comments

My name is Unk and I’m addicted to COMET TV. I can’t help it because they’re always showing the best stuff. And I love watching on my bunny-eared TV with clothes hangers and aluminum foil wrapped around the antenna. God help me, I even like the weird commercials that rudely assume I’m in golden years and have somehow fallen and can’t get up (that’s actually an assumption that gets more accurate with each passing day). Sorry, that fancy TV downstairs can go ahead and just stew in its HD juices, for all I care. My little TV is literally huggable. I don’t know, maybe I’m really addicted to nostalgia. It was always a treat for me as a kid to watch TV from under a blanket with my cat and now that my cat has been reincarnated, we still enjoy it! Anyway, you don’t need a TV to watch COMET TV, you can watch it on your computer anytime you like!

Anyway, I figured today for our weekly SUNDAY STREAMING shindig we’d try something different and I’d alert you to a movie that’s airing live tonight on COMET TV! At 6pm you can hit COMET TV and watch a strange little flick from 1991 called MOM. Have you seen this one? I avoided it for years because the VHS box made it look like some boring French comedy of some sort but it’s actually a straight up monster movie! It kind of reminds me of THE FLY (1986) a bit because it explores the limits of loyalty when a loved one progressively transforms into a toxic nightmare who threatens to drag you down with them. Making it even more worrisome is that it stars JEANNE BATES who triggers the hell out of me due to her mortifying presence in MULHOLLAND DRIVE (especially when she gets all miniaturized). Seriously, I did a terrified spit-take when she materialized in DIE HARD 2: DIE HARDER just this past holiday season! That old broad is scary (incidentally MOM features yet another DIE HARD 2 actor, ART EVANS, what does it mean?).

In closing, click HERE at 6! You’re going to be terribly convinced that MOM is going to be a goofy laugh riot from its cheap look and then by the time it’s over you’ll be all shocked at how strangely tragic and quietly unsettling it ends up being. MOM also stars the excellent BRION JAMES (THE HORROW SHOW) and ginger royalty MARY BETH McDONOUGH of THE WALTONS, MORTUARY (1983) and MIDNIGHT OFFERINGS (1981) fame! Furthermore, please remind me on a yearly basis that MOM is both a great Christmas horror movie and a great Mother’s Day horror movie! Thanks!

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Tags: Sunday Streaming