kindertrauma

Name That Trauma :: Reader MD2112 on an Indigo Man Art Book

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Hello all!

First of all, a big shout-out to the readers for helping me solve my last Name That Trauma about artist Laurie Lipton that I posted back in October.

My next query is also art-related. When I was around 9 years old (circa 1981), my family and I visited my 'hipster' uncle's house. He was always very avant-garde and into all sorts of art, music, and film. During our visit there, I came across a coffee-table book he had that was about a group of humanoid characters that were like colors personified. There was a yellow man, a red man, but the one that stuck out in my mind was an indigo man, mainly because I had never heard that word before. I don't remember much about the theme or the story of the book, but the paintings/drawings had such a surreal quality that they stick in my mind to this day.

I'd love to find out what the book was and the name of the artist, anybody? Bueller? Beuller?

—MD2112

It's a Wonderful Remake!

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Remember how we were just talking about how crummy the world would be without sequels? Well, I think it would be even worse without the even more maligned remake. Sorry, but some of my very best friends are remakes! There are many opportunities with remakes to expand upon ideas and to accomplish things previously impossible and, contrary to popular opinion, remakes do not have the power to jump in a time machine and assassinate the films they are based on and then steal their positions in the universe. So again, here comes a magic meteor to erase all remakes from existence! What a lesser world we'd be living in without the films below! (Feel free to add your favorites.)

THE THING (1982)

This one here is a no-brainer of course and please excuse me for stating the obvious. Sure, when this now beloved classic hit theaters most people were either not interested or saw is as a special effects laden insult to the longer titled, 1951 film based on JOHN W. CAMPBELL's "Who Goes There?" This movie is a fine example of why you should never take any critic's opinion as gospel. Sometimes greatness is particularly hard to identify because it walks so far ahead of the pack.

THE FLY (1986)

The original THE FLY (1958) will always be creepy fun but DAVID CRONENBERG was able to take a semi-hokey premise and graft upon it adult themes that would have never flown decades before. 1986's THE FLY oozes with visuals that the previous incarnation wouldn't dare imagine but it's also one the best relationship movies of any genre if you ask me.

INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS (1978)

Movies don't get much more brilliant than this and no it does not step on the toes of the 1956 predecessor in any way, shape or form. Those worried that substandard rehashes will mar the memory of superior source material take heart, nobody much recalls the 2007 pod people attack on NICOLE KIDMAN called INVASION.

THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (2003)

In my brain, TOBE HOOPER's TCM may be more of an absolute masterpiece than any of the films I've mentioned thus far. I don't think a film could capture horror in any purer form unless you could somehow get the Devil himself behind the camera. The 2003 version is nowhere near the same ballpark but for a mainstream flick sporting an attractive cast, it threw down the gauntlet and brought the ugly back. Over stylized though it may be, after years of clean-cut mall horror, its successful celebration of the sick, depraved and undoubtedly stinky hacked a path that allowed more aggressive horror to be made. Sure I could probably live without this one but could I live without all the films that were green-lit because of it? Nope.

MY BLOODY VALENTINE (2009)

Did this really happen? I'm still pinching myself. The original is one of my favorite slashers. I never dared dream that it would be remade or even remembered outside of nerdy horror circles. Not only was it made but it also stars TOM ATKINS and it's in 3-D. It even spurred a re-release of the original film on DVD with all of the deleted gore that I only ever fantasized about seeing returned. Oh yeah, it's a good movie too and I've watched it more times than I can count now. So let me make sure I've got the math right; this film brought back a favorite horror character (Harry Warden), actor (ATKINS) format (3-D sorry, haters) and resurrected the original film in its complete and intended form and it's entertaining as hell to boot. Yep, lots to bitch about here.

BLACK CHRISTMAS (2006)

A couple of years I ago I would have told you to stick this remake in a rocket and shoot it towards the sun but only after dousing it in turpentine first. Now I'm all obsessed with it. If I told you I watched it twice this past holiday season I lied. It was three times. Maybe I developed a sense of humor or maybe I realized that remaking BLACK CHRISTMAS ('74) wasn't quite the same thing as wallpapering over the Sistine Chapel. Who knew that when I searched my heart I would find that I had enough faith in the value of the original to believe it strong enough to withstand whatever was thrown at it? My childhood memories are not damaged, my life goes on as it did, except now I have this other really funny version of BLACK CHRISTMAS to enjoy every year along with the first.

THE RING/THE BLOB (2002/1988)

I like both these remakes better than the originals. I mean c'mon, among other things, the first RING has no NAOMI WATTS and the first BLOB is ruefully SHAWNEE SMITH-free. Nuff' said.

PSYCHO (1998)

I agree that this is a terrible, wretched remake but I do not agree that it should have never been made. What person interested in film would not want to at least try to sit through this failed experiment at least once? Watching a shot-for-shot remake with none of the original film's soul present or accounted for makes one appreciate the wondrous artistry that made the first film so dynamic. Plus if you want to fully grasp just what an incredible actor ANTHONY PERKINS was then, you need only observe a moment of VINCE VAUGHN. Sure it's torture but suffering leads to knowledge! Actually, I just had to put this up here to mortify those who might only be scanning the titles.

DAWN OF THE DEAD (2004)

I admit the holed up people in the mall are absolute morons for allowing that obvious zombie woman in the wheelbarrow into the place but that goof aside, this remake is non-stop cool from beginning to end. Truly, it leaves most zombie movies in the dust in its first fifteen minutes.

THE WIZARD OF OZ (1939)

I wonder if there were die hard fans of the 1910 take on FRANK L. BAUM's book that balked and cried when they heard there was going to be a fancy new fangled 1925 version. Did madly passionate fans of the 1925 version cringe and spew bile when they read on the Internet that a new version was being made in 1939? (Please, if you are now thinking of leaving a comment explaining to me that the Internet did not exist in 1925- don't do it, I beg you!)

It's a nice thing that fans are so passionate about their favorite films and it's a real shame that sometimes remakes don't turn out as good as they might. Still, I think people are a little nutso with how close-minded they can be and I wonder if maybe having their identity too wrapped up in stuff that they can't claim ownership of in the first place is the real problem. These movies belong to all of us and I don't mind my share being explored in new and different ways before I croak. You never know which ones are going to be excel and really nobody has the right to say there's no place like home until they're brave enough to journey somewhere else.

Name That Trauma Solved:: Charles P. of Young Monsters on Guess Who's Just Moved In Next Door?

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Hi hi! I first wrote to the Kindertrauma site in 2010 about "Night of the Lepus" and other films. (HERE)

I am writing again now for I recall someone, around that same time, trying to find out the name of a children's monster book that featured tons of worried monsters who all lived on the same street and were suspicious of their new neighbors who had just moved in…At the time I remembered having the book but it was on the other side of the country in storage at my parent's house so I couldn't remember the name of it or anything specific!

I am not sure if it has since been identified by others on the site, but…In case it hasn't I have just posted about it on my blog for I finally went back home and found it. The book is called 'Guess Who's Just Moved in Next Door?' It's by Colin McNaughton and it features tons of great monster drawings.

I devoted two blog posts to it HERE and HERE!

I hope this helps!

-CAP

UNK SEZ: Thanks very much Charles! That Name That Trauma from reader Kathryn (HERE) was never solved! Nice of you to remember!

Traumafession :: Drew B. On High Spirits

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Hello Kindertrauma,

I was wondering if you could help me piece together today's Traumafession – because I can't really find much in the way of screen caps or video clips online. I think you'll find that youtube has the entire movie up in several parts but nothing in the way of disembodied scenes.

Today I write to you of the 1988 comedy "High Spirits" starring Steve Guttenberg, Liam Neeson, Beverly D'Angelo, Daryl Hannah, Jennifer Tilly and the great Peter O'Toole. I believe Peter O'Toole to be one of the funniest movie men to come out of the 80s. The film "My Favorite Year" is as hilarious and quotable as "Caddyshack", "National Lampoon's Vacation" or "The Blues Brothers."

The movie is a fairly familiar haunted house story. O'Toole's Mr. Plunkett is the owner of an old castle in Ireland. He's decided to convert it into a bed & breakfast under the guise of being haunted in hopes to attract gullible tourists. However, once Plunkett and his staff start faking the phenomena – that's when the spirits of his dead relatives return from the grave to terrorize him for his wickedness!

There are several scenes in this film that make me wonder if the writiers didn't intend this to be a horror film before it was twisted and turned around by the studio into becoming a screwball comedy. Some things in here are really upsetting!

For example, several characters are chased by a pack of wild, ghostly nuns running down a hallway toward them! The nuns have black faces and glowing, red eyes (like the Jawas in "Star Wars").

In another scene – the staff is putting on a play set on the seas. Soon the audience is assaulted by forceful gusts of wind, flung spume and blown spray. The play's props become increasingly lifelike – ocean water, living birds, and worst of all – the very real tentacles of a terrible sea monster reach out into the crowd CAPTURING A YOUNG BOY AND PULLING HIM FROM HIS PARENTS AND INTO THE STAGE!

This movie – which all in all is a fairly decent comedy – ran on HBO a lot in the 1990s. I was able to commiserate with other kids on my block who had been exposed to the same horrors. I can't help but wonder if this film helped contribute to my irrational fear of cephalopods….From Hell.

—Drew B.

Name That Trauma!:: Nathan W. On An Animated Bat Attack!

Posted on By unkle lancifer

UNK SEZ: Nathan W. was kind enough to solve a Name That Trauma and now he has one of his own!

I remembered seeing it on the ABC Afterschool Special (I think…). All I remember is a boy is running down a boat dock being chased by an animated weird bat. The boy trips and tries to fight it off. I'm sorry if it is too vague but that is all I remember…

The Woman In Black (2012)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Traveling to the movie theater this aftern0on I said to myself "Lancey" — that's what I call myself – "if you're going to jump ship the first time a rotten looking CGI ghost appears, then turn right around and don't bother." Guess what though? I didn't have to worry, THE WOMAN IN BLACK is not as CGI-heavy as the commercials might have you believe. I'm thinking some of the TV spots have been tinkered with and exaggerated because on the big screen, everything looks mostly kosher and solid. In fact, this is a great looking film. Even if there was no story or sound, I could probably watch this thing as a slide show. It's very Goth-centric and chilly with fog, rain and marshy mildew all over the place. In other words, this is that dusty-doily type of spook show that I love and am always in the mood for. As far as I'm concerned, the world can keep its torture and rape and I'll take all the wind up monkeys that come to life for no reason.

This movie terrified me from the onset with the notion that DANIEL RADCLIFFE was old enough to be the father of a four year old. Wasn't he a kid two days ago? Talk about chilling. I'm really getting old! I'm going to be dead soon! After drilling that horrific idea into my head, the movie shoved a funnel in the open wound and began to pour all of my favorite depressing things inside: death, loss, suicide, hangings, the idea that a person could be so destroyed by an event that they never recover or so trapped in the molasses of grief that they end up haunting themselves, etc. This is my jam and I'm doing the twist in my head and I'm doing that twist to early records by THE CURE.

I was very lucky that a gaggle of young girls who I suspect were RADCLIFFE fans sat a couple rows behind me. The only other people in the theater were an older couple to my right. The teenagers had a blast screaming at every loud noise or appearance of the title apparition. One of them was fake crying through the heavier scares. I kept thinking, "Thank God it's not a group of boys behind me because they would have to prove how unscarable they are to each other and ruin the whole thing." I'm not going to tell you anymore. It's a movie about a guy and a ghost, a ghost who has a hard time forgiving. It takes place in a small town where only one person has a newfangled car. There are beautiful houses in it covered in vines and there are a couple scenes that are pretty flipping creepy.

If you are a fan of THE OTHERS or THE CHANGELING, you'll probably like this. There are a couple of great moments that might remind you of THE INNOCENTS and a couple of weak spots that may remind you of hokier more modern fare like DARNESS FALLS. Those lesser moments are brief, so who cares! Sorry if this review is lame but I wanted to get it done quick so that if anyone was on the fence about seeing it, I could push him or her off and say, "Go ahead!" This review could also be lame because I am now having a beer and yes, definitely listening to THE CURE! (Not doing the twist though.)

P.S.: This movie was directed by the same guy (JAMES WATKINS) who did EDEN LAKE which I approve of. He also wrote THE DESCENT 2 which I didn't care for but maybe the director of that one screwed it up. The screenplay was written by JANE GOLDMAN (KICK ASS) based on the novel by SUSAN HILL. There, now I feel better.

It's A Wonderful Sequel!

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Folks are always so crabby about sequels but the darn things have given me more than they have taken away and therefore I will always defend them. In fact, any time somebody says they hate a person, place or thing, I always wish I could send them into an alternate "It's a Wonderful Life!" type dimension where the source of their scorn does not exist and see how well they fare there. No, sequels are not always good but that bath water you just dumped out? There was a baby in there! Holy crap! You just killed a baby. As for me, if a magic meteor hit the planet and erased all sequels, here are the ten things that I would miss the most and immediately. Feel free to add what you would miss in the comments section!

THE BRIDE OF FRANKENSTEIN (1935)

I'm not alone in thinking I might like this sequel better than the film it sprung from. Doctor Preterious is a real hoot and if sequels didn't exist, I'm afraid UNA O'CONNOR as Minnie would disappear too! That's no good. And by the by, if you hate gay people then I must send you to a dimension where neither of the first two FRANKENSTEINs exist (as we know them) and guess what- there's no HELLRAISER, CHUCKY or KRISTY MCNICHOL there either. It's basically the lamest dimension ever.

PSYCHO II (1983)

PSYCHO is just the type of movie that nobody should be brave enough to wish a sequel for and yet sequels for it do exist and I think Part 2 is absolutely excellent. Some people think the less you know about a killer the more potent the horror but I, again, say hogwash to that. I'm grateful I got to see another side of Norman Bates (ANTHONY PERKINS). His relationship with Mary (MEG TILLY) who learns to have sympathy for the man she was raised to hate is one of my favorites in all of horror.

ALIENS (1986)

Everybody knows ALIENS is white-hot awesome but think of it this way; what if the character of Bishop never existed to prove that not all androids want to shove magazines down your throat? What if we never got to see Ripley's maternal instinct make the lateral jump from cat lover to child saver? Yikes, I could have possibly ended up a PAUL REISER fan if this movie didn't thoroughly convince me that he was a wretched person!

A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 3: DREAM WARRIORS (1987)

I'm sorry but the original ELM STREET only has its originality to boast over Part 3. Really can we just use this movie as a permanent template for what a sequel could and should be? What a great idea to get talented people with imaginations that actually like horror films to helm this project rather than just any available schlub! Hollywood write that concept down on a post-it and put it on your fridge. Say it after me, "There are no bad sequels, only bad filmmakers."

HALLOWEEN II (2009)

Back up townspeople! I can wave a torch too! Allow me to momentarily pretend that I have respect for those who don't get this movie. If you want to see the most tragic death ever presented in a slasher film, it's here. I guess not everybody is comfortable with a director pushing the boundaries of what a slasher film can convey and that's their prerogative. I've watched this every Halloween since it has come out and this year I found out- so does my niece! Hmmm, maybe you have to come from a weird family to fully appreciate this movie. I say that as a joke but I may be on to something. As long as I'm talking HALLOWEEN sequels, I should also add that HALLOWEEN III: SEASON OF THE WITCH (1982) is a vital part of my world.

FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 2 (1981)

Thank God the Internet as it is presently was not around when this came out! I can hear the gripes now, "How could they kill Alice?" "Jason can't be alive!" "How come what I imagined in my head is not what is on the screen?!" If FRIDAY neglected to stomp forward into Part 2, I'd have never known Ginny Field! And if it didn't go on even further, I would have lost my pals Shelly, Tommy Jarvis and Maddy! Good God, Tina's mom would be dust in the wind! What a horrible concept! Why am I torturing myself with these nightmare visions!

EXORCIST III (1990)

This title surely produced instant snickers after EXORCIST II: THE HYSTERICAL but surprise it has one of the scariest scenes ever and it employed both BRAD DOURIF and VIVECA LINDFORS of CREEPSHOW, so that's enough for me.

8 EVIL DEAD 2/DAWN OF THE DEAD (1987/1978)

Well this should hit the stock horror fan right where they live. Can you imagine a world where these two didn't exist? T-shirt, poster and DVD companies would go belly up and countless basement bedrooms would flood with tears! Hell, if these two horror gateway drugs didn't exist you could probably say goodbye to half the horror fans out there! Me, I'd miss the flying eyeball and that guy whose head gets shortened by a helicopter blade.

CURSE OF THE CAT PEOPLE (1944)

Aw, this is one of my favorite movies from my youth and it's a perfect example that a sequel can be its own beast and doesn't necessarily have to be a weak rehash of the original. This is another one that I like just as much as the first and it routinely gets short changed just for being inspired by something that previously existed. I ask you what movie out there can really claim to be wholly fresh and not influenced by anything that existed before it? I don't know what sun you live under but there's nothing new under the one above me. Although I have to say springtime in February is novel.

FINAL DESTINATION 5 (2011)

I think the most fun I had in an actual movie theater this year was seeing FINAL DESTINATION 5. For pure enjoyment value alone, it left most of the better-reviewed horror flicks looking pretty damn dingy to me. I have to give this movie some accolades for not only injecting pure adrenaline into a faultering franchise, but also for proving that the cynical ceiling built by negative naysayers is all in their minds. Truth is, it's never too late to make something worthwhile and not everybody has to love something to validate its existence. Just one fan blindly smitten or one afternoon spent contentedly lost inside the movie screen is worth it. I'm not exaggerating when I say I think it's a valuable life lesson to realize that even after the crappiest installment a stellar one can still follow.

So I say hug a sequel today and the next time you decide to rag on something imagine the poor world without it instead. Also don't choke people with rolled up magazines…ever.