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Traumafessions :: Reader NiNi on Rockwell’s “Somebody’s Watchin’ Me”

February 3rd, 2009 by aunt john · 13 Comments

After seeing that people were traumatized by HERBIE HANCOCK, I’m surprised there’s no mention of one-hit-wonder ROCKWELL, whose video for “Somebody’s Watchin’ Me” used to freak me the hell out as a kid. Highlights include the shadowy floating head, the zombie guy in tighty-whities carrying a roast pig (wtf??) and the shower spouting blood (a particular childhood worry of mine). But these weren’t the real traumatizers of this video; I’d been on a steady diet of horror movies practically since birth, thanks to a horror-loving mother.

No, the kicker was in the last moments of the video, where the creepy grinning mailman is seen to have a horribly deformed and strangely slimy-looking left arm, poorly concealed behind his mailbag. I suspect that it was scary because he looked otherwise normal (if a bit serial-killerish); making it worse is the way that poor ROCKWELL walks up to him in obvious relief after dealing with all the rest, only to be faced with this misshapen horror. Let me tell you, it made me suspicious of mailmen for quite some time! I would eye them surreptitiously, on the lookout for a disgusting withered claw, and all because of ROCKWELL.

Tags: Traumafessions

13 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Meep ParkerNo Gravatar // Feb 3, 2009 at 11:46 am

    There should probably be a poll for the scariest thing about The Rockwell video as almost everything that can be found in it, is truly frightening. Most especially witnessing Rockwell in The Shower! And is he technically the Final Girl in the video?

  • 2 jm_kayeNo Gravatar // Feb 3, 2009 at 12:02 pm

    i-mockery did a really good writeup on the video here:

    For me, the scariest thing was that damn pig.

  • 3 aunt johnNo Gravatar // Feb 3, 2009 at 12:08 pm

    @Meep: Technically, I believe he is. I want to know what’s up with that STEVIE NICKS character twirling about in the bathroom, and then later in the bedroom. And why are the topless men wearing what look like adult diapers?

  • 4 Meep ParkerNo Gravatar // Feb 3, 2009 at 1:50 pm

    Hi Aunt John!

    I think whatever the reason turns out to be, we can both agree that Rockwell was a misunderstood genius and I’d love to have him over for some tea and creme brulee. ‘Cause something in me believes he just rolls in high style!

  • 5 WarpedRecordNo Gravatar // Feb 3, 2009 at 3:00 pm

    I’d call Rockwell a two-hit wonder. “Obscene Phone Caller,” anyone? 

    While we’re on the subject, Planet P Project’s “Why Me” would be enough to freak out any child (or adult, for that matter), especially with the exploding dummy head at the end:

  • 6 Amanda By NightNo Gravatar // Feb 3, 2009 at 4:22 pm

    OMG! I Totally forgot Obscene Phone Caller!

    Rockwell was fucking hot and I don’t care who knows it. Also, they use this song in a Geico commercial now. So, you know he’s timeless and crap.

  • 7 aunt johnNo Gravatar // Feb 3, 2009 at 4:31 pm

    @Meep: Can I bring a covered dish and the MARY JANE GIRLS? In my book, they epitomize high style, which is to say, whomever dressed them was clearly stoned.

  • 8 Amanda By NightNo Gravatar // Feb 3, 2009 at 6:28 pm

    I LOVED the Mary Jane Girls. I was at the gym the other day and they played it. It was the best time.

    I know. I’m lame.

  • 9 micksterNo Gravatar // Feb 3, 2009 at 8:07 pm

    I always found this video to be creepy too. I’m with you Auntie J, why are those dudes wearing diapers? Amanda, lame or totally cool? I vote for totally cool! I think the video for Prime Time by the Alan Parsons Project is eerie. I mean APP plus mannequins equals scary in my mind.

  • 10 NiNiNo Gravatar // Feb 4, 2009 at 12:20 am

    AUGH GOD THE HAND. That still creeps me out, and I’m the kind of person who finds Ichi the Killer funnier every time I watch it. I am relieved that my present mail carrier is a small Asian lady, somehow she seems less likely to suddenly spring a horrible claw-hand on me than the grinning freak in the video…

  • 11 VicarOfVHSNo Gravatar // Feb 4, 2009 at 5:42 pm

    Good one! Another video that freaked me out was “Our Love’s in Jeopardy.” Especially when they do that body-horror thing with the couple holding hands…

  • 12 Meep ParkerNo Gravatar // Feb 7, 2009 at 11:41 am

    I love the Mary Jane Girls! Way to bring that back for me!

  • 13 DarthPariahNo Gravatar // Feb 9, 2009 at 11:18 am

    The scariest thing about this song was Michael Jackson’s “you’re-squeezing-my-goolies-that’s-why-I-sing-this-high” backing vox! Definite agreement about that Greg Kihn vid, though; kind of out of character for such a likeable guy with harmless pop songs.

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