Pennywise (TIM CURRY) admits "They all float down here." in the miniseries adaptation of STEPHEN KING's IT
Author: unkle lancifer
Name That Trauma:: Reader Craig on Missing Eyes-Krispies Commercial
Please help me out with verifying that this commercial really did exist; In the mid/late '90s there was a commercial on T.V. that played in Canada for Rice Krispies/Rice Krispies Squares that involved carolers singing outside the home of a man and a woman. She fed them Rice Crispies squares, all was well with the world, and the commercial ended. BUT…there was a nanosecond epilogue after the commercial wrapped when the man grabbed at his eye socket and said, "Honey, my eye just fell out!"
EVERYONE saw that commercial, but NO ONE noticed that extra couple of seconds except me. Then one day a friend called up and proclaimed me "not crazy" because she had noticed it too. This is not a joke, or put-on, or the result of drug-use. I swear this actually existed.
Does anyone at KinderTrauma remember this, or have the kind of all-powerful access to finding it that you seem to have with everything else oddball that has haunted someone for years?
The Blue Bird (1940)
When I was little I came across the 1940 SHIRLEY TEMPLE movie THE BLUE BIRD several times on television. It's sort of the poor man's THE WIZARD OF OZ with SHIRLEY playing the part of a girl named Mytyl who along with her brother Tytyl embarks on a journey through the past and future searching for happiness in the form of the title bird. The children are aided by their dog Tylo and their cat Tylette, who thanks to some fairy magic, have taken human form.
Based on a 1908 play by MAURICE MAETERLINCK, there's plenty to find alarming about THE BLUE BIRD. The children's journey begins in a vast graveyard, their dead grandparents show up to pelt them with guilt, trees transform into vigilantes and finally they end up in some weird limbo place where unborn children in togas howl and cry about how short their time on Earth will be. Personally I was unmoved by any and all of the insanity on display except the unfortunate and fiery death of my favorite character, the cat lady Tylette.
As I watched THE BLUE BIRD again recently as an adult I can see that much of it flew over my head as a kid, most notably the fact that Tylette the cat is clearly drawn as a sinister, mischievous presence and that her demise is meant to be somewhat deserved. Was there something wrong with me as a kid that I would automatically gravitate toward this malevolent malcontent? Before you judge, look at how awesome she is…
To be honest, even as an adult I have sympathy for this devil. She knows that if the children were to discover the blue bird of happiness that she would have to revert back to her former self and remain a "dumb slave to man" forever. So what if a couple tykes have to die in order for her to remain master of her own fate? Let's face it; with names like Mytyl and Tytyl, those kids were bound for hard times anyway.
Tylette is brought to life by Oscar-winner GALE SONDERGAARD, who would go on to appear in several UNIVERSAL horror films like THE BLACK CAT (1941), THE SPIDER WOMAN (1944) and THE SPIDER WOMAN RETURNS (1946) (in which, again, GALE's death is caused by fire.) She was originally cast as the wicked witch in THE WIZARD OF OZ who was first conceived as a sinister glamour-puss similar to the evil queen in Disney's SNOW WHITE. When it was decided that a more haggard version of the witch was the way to go, GALE split and in came MARGARET HAMILTON. (HAMILTON nearly abandoned WIZARD herself when her costume caught fire and she was severely burned.) SODDENGAARD's career was seriously hampered when her husband, director HERBERT BIBERMAN, was accused of being a communist during the infamous red scare of the early ‘50s; she died in 1985
You know, as unhappy as I may still be with Tylette's fiery fate, there's no way around the fact that her death is the most exciting part of the film. In fact, the movie kind of looses its steam as soon as she departs. I know we are meant to learn from this tale that happiness can only be found at home but if you ask me, without an evil, self-serving sociopath like Tylette to share it with, happiness is for the birds.
CREEPY NOTE: During the filming of THE BLUE BIRD four year old actress CARYLL ANN EKELUND was burned to death off set when her birthday dress (or Halloween costume, depending on your source) caught on fire. She was buried in the clothes she wore in the film.
ALSO: I feel I should warn you that THE BLUE BIRD was made into a musical in 1976 starring JANE FONDA, ELIZABETH TAYLOR and a tiny PATSY KENSIT as Mytyl. Believe it or not, this American, Soviet Union co-production was directed by legendary director GEORGE CUKOR. It could very well be one of the worst movies of all time and masochists can find it on Youtube. In this version, Tylette is portrayed by CICELY TYSON. CUCKOR accused TYSON of using voodoo to curse the film.
MORE CREEPY: No joke, I was in a thrift store yesterday and this song was playing on the loudspeaker…(yes, I've double checked the smoke alarms)
Night of the Creeps (Director's Cut DVD)
In our recent LOOK BACK ON 2009 I mentioned some DVD releases that I was particularly happy about. Ever since I have been kicking myself (like ALICE, it's my favorite sport) because I neglected to mention a couple of other really great titles. There's MESSIAH OF EVIL (thanks to Reader Taylor for reminding me of that one) PHANTASM 2 (Phinally!), and the great THE GATE (whose remarkable effects look even more remarkable on DVD) and most importantly… NIGHT OF THE CREEPS!
How could I forget N.O.T.C.? Well, I didn't really forget it, I just hadn't bought it yet due to moths in wallet syndrome but that sad glitch has been fixed. Unfortunately, yet another bricks and mortar video store in our area is closing but not unfortunately, I was able to vulture a half price copy of CREEPS right off its corpse! So now it's mine, all mine and I couldn't be happier because it's a super awesome jam packed director's cut DVD.
We already reviewed CREEPS way back WHEN so I won't go into the plot, suffice to say it involves aliens, zombies, sorority girls and TOM ATKINS. That's really all ya' need to know and if you haven't seen it yet, you simply have to, particularly if you dig eighties horror. CREEPS is like RETURN OF THE LIVING BREAKFAST CLUB, you just can't find a better time capsule.
So I'm not crazy about the cover art or the comic book menu design, but the extras shine like a KOJAK dome polished with Crisco. Two, count 'em two commentaries; one with director FRED DEKKER (who also helmed the lovable MONSTER SQUAD) and one with the film's cast which includes JASON LIVELY of NATIONAL LAMPOON'S EUROPEAN VACATION and the cutest girl who ever lived JILL WHITLOW. There's a superior alternate ending, a tasty trailer and a gratifying plethora of mini docs that go into great detail about the making of this cult classic.
The high point is seeing the core cast reunited, there's obviously real affection on display and it's always an honor to hear any word ATKINS utters. I can't fathom how N.O.T.C. avoided becoming a hit upon release. From what we learn from director DEKKER it sounds like the studio did a crappy job of supporting and distributing the film (times sure have changed, haven't they?) Oh well, as I told my golfing buddy TIGER WOODS, "It's better too be loved deeply by a few than cheaply by a slew." The important thing is, this fun, effervescent, endlessly quotable gem is finally getting the presentation it deserves and passionate new fans are an inevitability.
Kindertrauma Funhouse :: Amity-Calamity
Hey, Look! I grabbed a shot from each and every AMITYVILLE HORROR film. Can you tell which image is from which movie?
Lake Mungo
Just when I thought I was too jaded to appreciate the sub-genre of faux-reality horror, in slinks the not very creepy sounding but very creepy indeed, LAKE MUNGO. My little MUNGO is such a well-crafted film that its unauthentic nature becomes absolutely irrelevant. Seriously, this is one of the best documentaries I have ever seen, who cares if it's not real? Who needs "real" anyway? Art has been cleaning up reality's mess since the beginning of time. Feel free to quote me on this; art is reality's janitor. Why am I talking about art? Because that's what this MUNGO film is, that's why.
I blame part of my abhorrence towards PARANORMAL ACTIVITY on envious outrage. How dare that film dispense creep-cookies to everyone who stood in line except me? I like to get spooked too ya' know. Well, PARANORMAL ACTIVITY, I don't need you or your stinkin' creep-cookies, I found a less shaky fake-y with characters deeper than a Petri dish, a story that took more than five minutes to conjure and egads, something to say besides "boo!" and yea, it deigned to feed even little old me some delicious creep-cookies. In fact, it pretty much shoveled creep cookies down my throat and I liked it…I liked it! I liked it like Carrie White's mama likes whiskey breath.
LAKE MUNGO takes the mockumentary approach (think CURSE OF THE BLAIR WITCH rather than THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT) while telling the tale of the Palmer family (DAVID LYNCH fans, that surname is no accident!) who have lost their daughter to a drowning in the lake of the film's title. Through interviews and the presentation of assorted memorabilia we get an intimate front row seat as the family's surviving members concurrently fight to accept their loss, speculate that her spirit may still remain and discover ugly truths about the deceased. MUNGO goes back and forth suggesting that the supernatural may or may not be involved but it hardly matters, as the Palmers are truly haunted in every other aspect. In fact, the film's coda seems to be, "You don't have to make this crap up…look around you!"
This is the type of rare horror film that actually has the cajones mas grandes to look death in the eye. Whatever unseen entity may be shadowing the Palmers, the family has much more profound things to express to it than, "Get off my lawn!" When we are made privy through diary entries to the dead daughter's precognition that something is getting closer and that she may be circling life's drain, the atmosphere literally floods with existential dread. Ultimately, first time director JOEL ANDERSON understands that a picture is worth a thousand words and we are shown one image near the film's close that is such a doozy that all thousand of those words is "Yikes!"
Usually the biggest hurdle for a film that portends to be real to jump is the acting, nothing bursts the reality bubble faster than an over enthusiastic ad libber and plot progressing behavior that simply doesn't ring true. MUNGO's cast skates by these issues with ease, nobody is less than authentic and ma and pa Palmer are pretty damn astounding in their shell-shocked lethargy. Now, to be honest there are several pieces to the overall puzzle that do not fit in as smoothly as the rest, but by the time the credits roll the overall sensation it leaves you with overpowers any quibbles. I don't want to curse this movie with too much praise but if you're looking for a highly original ghost tale and you appreciate your scares whispered in your ear quietly rather than dumped in your lap like a plate of spaghetti this is for you.
LAKE MUNGO has been selected as part of this year's AFTER DARK HORRORFEST and I recommend you go see it if you can. Being that it deals with accepting tragic loss rather than posturing and preserving one's haul, I doubt it will find as wide an audience as PARANORMAL ACTIVITY did; but yeah, I'm saying that it's a far superior, vastly more satisfying film. You may not feel an affinity with all of the sorrow and grief on display, but isn't it the biggest creep-cookie of all to know that inevitably someday you will?
Traumafessions :: Reader Juturne on Munchers: A Fable
I need to mention the most horribly disturbing claymation dental hygiene film they made us watch at school.
I have hunted it down and found it here…
Just wait until you see Jack Sweet… I swear this scarred me for life. Even worse I LOVE animation and manga, etc. It's practically all I watch and read as an adult but I've had the worst fear of claymation ever since those days…. I can't even watch the old Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer and Frosty the Snowman stop motion X-Mas specials to this day. In fact, you might want to add those to your list as well. They're quite creepy too…
I guess the only positive is that I have lovely teeth today…. but at what mental cost????
I'm very happy to have found you and to get this off of my chest.
Name That Trauma :: Reader Andrew D. on a Dirty Deal With the Devil
Have a trauma question.
O.K., love your sight by the way, it has helped me in the past.
O.K., so I think this was a PBS T.V. movie, most likely at least. Anyway, it takes place around the 1800s or so. This guy (possibly a soldier) has a meeting with the Devil while walking down the road. The Devil gives him this coat which is magical; it will never run out of money. The catch is the man must not take a bath, shave, trim his nails, etc. for a year or maybe more.
At first he parties and has the time of his life. But soon as he gets smelly he is forced to go stay in barns, etc. At this one farmhouse he helps out the owner with money in exchange for letting him stay there. The farmer promises him his daughter in marriage. He makes her a ring out of his nail trimmings. In the end he wins the contest, the Devil cleans him and he marries the girl.
Any help? I saw it probably 15 or more years ago.
UNK SEZ: Andrew, my hair stood on end when I read your Name That Trauma because I came across this same production on PBS at roughly the same time. You remembered a lot more concrete details than I did, but the time period and the deal with the devil rang a bell with me. I had too little to go on myself but with your added information, it seems I have solved this mystery for both of us!
It's called BEARSKIN, OR THE MAN WHO DIDN'T WASH FOR SEVEN YEARS. It's based on a story by THE BROTHERS GRIMM and it's a short film (20 min.) that was frequently shown in classrooms and on PBS. Even better, I found a clip that brought the memories flooding back which you can see below.
Thanks Andrew, I would never have found this without you!
